


days gone by

by joshriku



Category: Kingdom Hearts
Genre: Character Study, Comfort, Fluff, Gen, Talking, riku addressing the shit he did in 358/2 days is good actually
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-06
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 18:40:41
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,276
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24031438
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/joshriku/pseuds/joshriku
Summary: Riku apologizes to Xion. On the other hand, Xion did not even expect an apology to begin with.
Relationships: Riku & Xion (Kingdom Hearts)
Comments: 4
Kudos: 26





	days gone by

“Are you here to visit Naminé?” is the first thing she asks Riku as soon as she sees him. 

Riku is the very image of someone who had rehearsed what to say and got abruptly interrupted. Xion laughs, but internally, as Riku composes himself again. 

“No, I’m actually here to see you.” He smiles, looking awkward around the edges, but still genuine. It’s good to see him smile. “Do you want to join me for ice cream…?” 

So formal-sounding. Xion didn’t expect this, not today at all, but she still nods. She hasn’t had a chance to talk to Riku ever since everything ended, and fair enough—she was busy with her own things, settling down, getting used to life once more. 

She’s never disliked Riku too much—maybe at first, but to Xion, he’s been… _someone,_ that’s for sure. Not quite a friend but not an enemy—just the right person at the wrong time. At the end of the day, she trusted him, and it was hard to not appreciate him. She was half-hoping if she ever got another chance, that maybe she could talk to Riku more, and not just about Sora and their destinies. 

It’s agonizingly quiet walking to the clock tower, the silence only broken with very forced attempts at chit-chat—it’s clear by now that Riku has something specific to say and hasn’t really thought about other topics than that. 

Finally, once they reach the clocktower, she and Riku take a seat next to each other. Xion turns to look at him. “Well? You seem like you have something to say.” 

“Yeah, listen…” Riku inhales. “I’m sorry. For everything.” 

That’s the _last_ thing Xion expected. Sure, she knew Riku didn’t have much of a choice while doing everything, and had she been in his shoes, she would’ve acted like he did. But this…? She looks at him with slightly wide eyes, and just in case, she urges him on, “What do you mean?” 

“I _did_ hurt you pretty badly that one time,” Riku says, wincing, like the memory itself brought more pain than it should. Xion remembers it pretty well, too—Riku was extremely strong, even back then. “And then I kept driving you away from your friends… making you think you had a choice at all. I was just hoping you’d surrender in a pacific way. I must’ve brought you a lot of stress.” 

Xion looks down at the sunset. It’s nostalgic, even though she’s very much there at the moment. She gets taken back to those days: to the hopelessness, the feeling of being _lost,_ looking up to Riku like he had all the answers about how to proceed. And at the time, it seemed like he did—even when she was actively stopping Sora from waking up, Riku had been kind enough to let her make up her mind. The memories are so odd, almost like they belong to a different Xion, and not the current her. 

“You really didn’t know what you were doing back then, did you, Riku?” she asks, softly. “I used to think you had all the answers on what was right or wrong to do when it came to my situation.” 

It’s almost like Riku bought the ice cream for decoration more than to actually eat it, as Xion watches it drip from up high all the way down to the floor. Riku isn’t looking at her at all. 

Finally, he sighs. “No. I was sad and scared. I was just—doing what I had to do. What seemed right at the time. It doesn’t mean it’s okay.” 

Was anything about their situation okay, in any way? Xion tries to stray away from those thoughts, these days. There’s no use in dwelling in her past, and instead, she’s thankful to this new body and heart. She’s thankful for her current life. And most of all, she’s thankful to her friends—Sora, who never gave up on her, even when he didn’t know who she was. It’s almost rude, how little thought she had given to her situation with Riku, compared to how it seemed to be eating Riku inside. 

Different perspectives were funny sometimes. 

“So I’m sorry,” Riku continues when she’s processing the information. “I’m sorry for hurting you. And I’m sorry for making you come to terms with everything—for driving you away from your friends. I’m very glad you’re okay, but I just… had to settle this, you know?” 

“I know,” Xion nods. She’s happy he apologized, anyway. “You’re right. You _do_ hit pretty hard, did you know?” 

Riku averts his gaze down instead of looking at the sunset. 

“Either way, Riku…” she takes a second to gather herself up again—it’s weird, to give everything so much thought again, and to relive those moments one more time. “I’m glad you apologized. But I… didn’t really hold it against you.” 

Riku turns around, finally looking at her. “You didn’t?” 

“Yes. I don’t have any grudges for what you did.” Xion smiles, hard around the edges. “If we were to reverse this—if I had to save my friends, too, I think I would’ve acted the same way you did. You didn’t drift me away from my friends, Riku, it was my choice.” 

“You didn’t have much of that—” 

“And did you have a choice, too?” 

He stays silent as well. 

“It was a bad situation,” Xion points out again. “None of us were having a good time. If anything… I’m glad things went the way they did. If I had refused… if I hadn’t understood what you explained me, you would’ve taken me out forcefully, right?” 

Riku’s lips go on a thin line. “Yeah.” 

“Then I’m glad that’s not what happened.” 

“It just—it feels bad,” he explains, quiet, “to see you… and Roxas… and remember everything I’ve done to you. It’s like I’ll never finish making it up to you.” 

“I’ve told you, I don’t have any grudges against you. I’ve never hated you.” Xion pauses. “I can’t speak for Roxas. That’s a talk you should have with him.” 

“I plan to. It’s… it seemed easier to talk to you, that’s all.” 

She smiles genuinely at him, and he gives a small one back. 

“You could start making it up by making new memories with me, you know,” Xion attempts to dissipate the heavy atmosphere between them. “I started school recently.” 

“Oh, did you?” 

“Yup! Math is awful! You could come over sometime, help me out with homework. You know, things that friends do.” 

Riku is funny when he’s surprised. “Friends?” 

“We’re eating ice cream here. That makes us friends.” 

“That easy, huh…?” He shakes his head, starting to loosen up. It’s a good look—Xion briefly thinks how she’s never seen him smile until now. “Sounds like a deal. I… don’t know much math either, though, just saying.” 

“Seems like no one does. Why do they teach it?” Riku laughs at that. “Thank you, Riku. I mean it. For the apology, and you know… for guiding me to Sora. I wouldn’t be here if it wasn’t for you.” 

At last, Xion says the right thing to him. It’s true after all, isn’t it? Had Riku not guided her, who knows where she would’ve ended up? What Xemnas would’ve done? Many possibilities, endless scenarios, and yet this is the one she likes most—this is the place she is meant to be. 

“Thank you, too. I needed that.” 

“No worries. We should probably get you another ice cream, though,” she gestures at Riku’s glove, awfully drenched with sea-salt ice cream. “Make sure you eat it this time!” 

“Yes, ma’am.” 

**Author's Note:**

> riku roxas n xion are my favorite characters but riku and xion... (my heart grows very fond). this is super self-indulgent i love them both so much. 358/2 days fucks me up in the best way and riku in it makes me sad, but you know what makes me sadder? going over all the things he did and realizing how nobody in that game had a goddamn choice wow. sad masterpiece............. thanks for reading ^__^  
> [tumblr](http://joshrikus.tumblr.com/)  
> [twitter](http://twitter.com/joshriku/)  
> 


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